Dear Eye View
My boyfriend of four years and I are breaking up after a rather bitter relationship. At the worst part of the relationship, he cheated on me with someone he used to date in college. He says, and I believe, that he thought it was a mistake. Upon my request, he let her know that I’d found out and that he would not communicate with or see her anymore. She works for a corporation with a household name, and I viewed their ethics policy online. It states that members of the public and employees of the corporation can and should report any unethical use of corporation resources. There is no “statute of limitations” and it can be done anonymously. My ex-boyfriend said that he did not want me to inform the corporation that she had used the company hotel suite and comp account to carry on an affair—she paid for his drinks and his parking—because that would “bring her back into our lives.” (She had threatened to press harassment charges against me if I contacted her.) Can I file an anonymous complaint with her employer? Angry
I understand your concern. The statute of limitations has expired on your relationship, and you should seek to have it expire on the way you deal with the world. By your own account you had a four-year bitterness fest. It was punctuated by your boyfriend seeking more pleasurable company elsewhere. What you do now is look inward and try to understand your role in this unhappiness and address that. It’s one thing, like the letter writer above, to have understandable fantasies about the grisly end of someone who broke your heart. It’s another to actually try to damage the career of a bit player in your life. On the other hand tape is good for household problems.