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Ask The Eye Sometimes Actions Can Have Painful Consequences

Dear Eye View

My boyfriend and I met and fell in love three years ago, while we were both married to other people (we both have children). My marriage ended quickly. He felt he should try to work it out with his wife, but this past summer they filed for divorce. We brought our relationship out in the open. I know what we did was wrong, and I’m ashamed that it’s part of our history. My family accepts that we’re together. His family blames me for his divorce and thinks that I’m with him only because he’s financially stable. They stay in contact with his ex-wife and refuse to acknowledge my existence. His mother told him that it would be better for his kids if he moved away and let his ex-wife have sole custody. This Thanksgiving my kids are with their dad, and his kids are with their mom. My parents are going away to see relatives but I can’t join them. My boyfriend decided to spend Thanksgiving with his parents and siblings and their families, even though I’m not welcome. I understand that he wants to see his family. If we’re going to have a future, though, at some point he’s going to have to insist that we’re a package deal. Is it reasonable for me to still be punished in this way? Maybe I should just accept that I have to spend a solitary Thanksgiving.

—Scarlet Letter

Dear Scarlet

I understand your concern. This Thanksgiving dinner when you are standing over the sink eating a rotisserie chicken out of the package with your bare hands like an animal, remember that actions can  have painful consequences. There’s always Arbor Day. Hope this helps..

EV

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