Dear Eye View
My sister and brother-in-law struggled for infertility for about the past four years. In this time period, I had my second child and two of our cousins had children. My sister made it clear that baby-related parties and activities were hard on her and her husband. We all appreciated this and tried to limit our baby conversation in her presence. She also did not attend baby showers and baby baptisms for me or our cousins. We made a conscious effort to have adult-only dinners with our parents where we all paid for a sitter. A few weeks ago she announced that the last round of IVF was successful and she was about 12 weeks along. We were all ecstatic for her. But then she started emailing us instructions for what she expected: gender reveal party, elaborate baby showers, and explicit instructions on hospital visitation times. We understand that she is excited, but what she wants us to host for her is above and beyond what we did for our own pregnancies and above and beyond what I can afford in terms of both energy and money. I am hesitant to bring this up to her because I know she has suffered a great deal of heartache. Should I go along with her plans, taking into account how sensitive she can be over this issue? Mad
Dear M
I understand your concern. You are excited about your sister but find all this excessive. If you like, ignore her list of social activities but if asked, tell her annoying gender reveal parties could prove to be an olympic event. Hope this helps
EV
Moody Eye View 
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