Archive for September, 2013

Ask The Eye That Science Stuff Comes From Jesus

September 20, 2013

Dear Eye View

As a first-grader I was given an IQ test, scored more than 160 and was declared a “genius.” This led to years of heightened expectations, profound failures, disappointed teachers and family, and ostracism (I was skipped two grades and did not fit in socially.) I eventually dropped out of high school during my freshman year. I later managed to successfully continue my education and got a graduate degree. I’m basically happy, but not a highly successful person. My family was abusive, and I have a weird personality, but the “genius” treatment didn’t help. I’m now married and have a 4-year old son. Because he  was somewhat shy and anti-social, we were advised to have him evaluated for autism spectrum disorder. They said he doesn’t have that, but he was given an IQ test. The psychologist literally came out to the waiting area shouting that he was “a genius!” I had a PTSD reaction to this, bundled him up and fled. I have not mentioned any of this to my husband. He was also labeled a genius at a young age, failed miserably in school, and has had a largely unsuccessful career. But he’s proud of his genius label and does not see it as part of his later problems. I fear that he would be boastful to his large and very competitive family and impose some of the heightened expectations on him that we both suffered from. Next year my son will begin kindergarten and I just learned that our district has a nearby magnet for students with exceptionally high IQs. My instinct is to keep my son far away from the school psychologist and the tiger mommies and daddies around that pressure cooker. I am not in the habit of keeping secrets from my husband or denying my child opportunities, so I’m feeling guilty. I also feel that once the cat is out of the bag, there’s little hope of normalcy for my son’s childhood. He’s a happy little kid right now. Advice?

—Just Wanting the Best

Dear WTB

It would be best for your son if the adults in his life were able to not project their fears and fantasies on his little shoulders and just allow him to explore the wonders of being young. You raise a wise and absolutely legitimate point about your own early labeling and its destructive powers. In Mindset, Stanford psychology professor Carol Dweck explores the damage done by imposing on people a fixed mindset rather than a growth mindset. She writes that people who believe intelligence or talent are given and immutable end up expecting these qualities alone to lead to success (you’ve seen they don’t), and can spend more time documenting their gifts than developing them (as may have been the case with your husband). That being said have him tested to make sure your son is not crazy. Look on the bright side  if you have other children they will probably be  dumb as soup.

Hope this helps.

EVSheldon-sheldon-cooper-

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Ask The Eye Look On the Rosie Side

September 16, 2013

Dear Eyeview

I recently moved in with my girlfriend of two years and things are going swimmingly. She is a beautiful, caring, and devoted partner, and I am thankful for having her in my life every day. As I consider our future together, her past continues to haunt me. Early on in our relationship she shared with me that she spent a summer working as a professional dominatrix. I was shocked and disgusted by the things she did, and by the seemingly unemotional and detached way in which she talked about them. She was also involved with one of her “slaves” outside of the workplace. We have come a long way since then and I am deeply in love with the woman that I know now. We have even experimented with some kinky stuff of our own and are very comfortable with each other. However, every once and a while this comes back to haunt me. When it does, I feel like I lose control of my thoughts and focus only on negative graphic images, whereas since we have such a wonderful and charmed life together, I should really just pick up my head and take a look around. I recognize how unfair this for her and I have finally admitted to myself that I need help working through this with counseling, but am afraid that it will ruin us. How do I let go?  Concerned

Dear C

I understand your concern. You must let go of her past, so you can move on with your future. To let go of the unwanted negative video loop running in your head replace it with another. Look on the Rosie side. Hope this helps.

EV

 

rosey odonell

 

 

Ask The Eye What Would Stacee Jaxx Do?

September 13, 2013

Dear Eye View

I’m a 50-year-old photographer. I married my college sweetheart and we’ve been happily married for almost 30 years. We have two grown children who are doing well. About four years ago, my wife had breast cancer, a mastectomy, and chemotherapy. It was traumatic and after her treatment she told me that she was no longer interested in sex. I figured the experience, understandably, might make her shy away from intimacy for a while. I’ve said that I still love her more than anyone in the world, and that she’s beautiful to me, which is true. From time to time, I’ve told her that I miss intimacy with her. She’s thanked me for the compliment, but it hasn’t gone any further than that.  As a  photographer, I’m asked to take pictures of rock bands. Three weeks ago I was at a club and a twentysomething man walked up to me. He said, “This band has a large gay following. Are you gay?” I said, “No. I’m married. I’m just here to take photos.” He said, “Well, I think you’re hot. If you’re bi-curious, my apartments is nearby.” Nothing like that had ever happened to me before. He was young, and handsome. I thought, “Why not? I found it to be interesting and enjoyable, but not something I’d been longing for all of my life. What I did I find that I longed for was the passion. Three times that night, he said, “You are such a sexy man.” No one had ever said to me before and I keep hearing those words in my head. Since then, I’ve had a bunch of conflicted feelings. I feel sad about betraying my wife. I also keep scanning crowds to see if I can find that guy again. I don’t think that it’s the sex that I want, so much as the passion and appreciation. I would like to find some way to explain my feelings to my wife, but I can’t tell her about the one-night stand. She’s not homophobic, but the fact that I’ve strayed outside of marriage would be painful for her. Your thoughts? Confused

Dear Confused

I understand your concern. The rock and roll life can get a little strange. Often when I am at the cross roads of a decision I ask myself,what would Stacee Jaxx do? Best to stay with your wife. Otherwise it could get a little hairy.

Hope this helps

EV

cruise-monkey

 

 

How To Find A Vegan In A Crowded Whole Foods? Dont Worry

September 11, 2013

A radical ‘artificial egg’ backed by Paypal  billionaire Peter Thiel and Bill Gates goes on sale in US supermarkets for the  first time today. Made from plants, it can replace eggs in everything from cakes to mayonnaise – without a chicken ever coming close to the production process. The team today started selling their ‘plant  egg’, called Beyond Eggs, in Whole Foods in California – and say it could soon  be available in supermarkets worldwide.Tetrick’s idea was to find a mix of easy-to-grow  plants that, when mixed together in the right way, replicate the taste,  nutritional values and cooking properties of an egg.

How to find a Vegan in a crowded Whole Foods?  Dont worry they’ll f*ing tell you..

 

vegans

 

Americans Still Mixed, Hesitant After Obama’s Syria Plea, Yahoo Jibber Jabber

September 11, 2013

Weary from two punishing wars half a world away, and anxious about opening a new front in the treacherous Middle East, Americans gathered around TV sets Tuesday night to hear President Obama make a case for U.S. intervention in Syria.

Polls have shown strong resistance to any U.S. military role in Syria’s devastating civil war even before a dramatic diplomatic alternative had emerged: Russia’s proposal to place Syria’s chemical weapons stockpiles under international control.

Yahoo News data  shows 90% of public against somthing as mixed on the other hand presents  52% for something as a mandate. Yahoo Jibber Jabber

 

confusing

Corporations Starting To Push Retiree’s Health Care Plan Onto Taxpayers, Both Thumbs Way Up

September 9, 2013

America’s biggest employers, from GE to IBM, are increasingly moving retirees to insurance exchanges where they select their own health plans, an historic shift that could push more costs onto U.S. taxpayers.

Time Warner Inc. (TWX) yesterday said it would steer retired workers toward a privately run exchange, days after a similar announcement by International Business Machines Corp. General Electric Co. (GE) last year said it, too, would curb benefits in a move that may send some former employees to the public insurance exchanges created under the 2010 Affordable Care Act.

Obamacare now shifting both public and private pension healthcare plans onto taxpayers.

retirementage65

Eyeview Amber Alert DNA Not Always The Answer

September 9, 2013

One of law enforcement’s most important crime-fighting tools isn’t a fancy gadget or computer often glamorized on television crime shows.
It’s you. Information provided by the public – even seemingly “small” tips – regularly help lawmen crack cases or locate suspects in hiding. As useful as fingerprints and DNA can be to an investigation, it may still take a phone call from a concerned citizen to help investigators tie all the pieces together.The community can be an extra set of eyes and ears before officers arrive on scene and even after they leave. Sometimes a simple observation or even something overheard in neighborhood gossip can be the final piece needed to identify and arrest criminals.

DNA not always the answer for unsolved murders.

 

kentucky